Sunday, 16 October 2011

Writers are Bonkers

Last week's disappointment at having written only one-and-a-bit chapters has been beautifully overshadowed by my having written less than one chapter this week.  I basically took the 'bit' from last week and finished it off to make Chapter 28.  Should I wallow in a pit of self-loathing at this pathetic lack of progress or should I continue to go with my mantra of 'well at least it's better than nothing'.

Despite what many people (or perhaps just my father) seem to think, I do have a tendency towards optimism so I'm going to go with the latter option.  It is better than nothing.  It's a lot worse than what I would have hoped to do (say, three chapters) but it's still something.  And when I completed said chapter this afternoon I was pleased with how it went and had that little post-writing glow which I've been experiencing all too infrequently of late.  But it was there.  Yay for the glow!

I would like to be writing more - and will once more optimistically aim to do better this week - but given my state of mind at the moment I'm pretty lucky to be producing anything.

And why have I been the Queen of Grumpiland this week?  Job-hunting, that's why.  I knew the job market was bad but seriously?  All the jobs out there seem to fall into one of three categories:

1) Jobs I am not and will never be suitable for (e.g. truck driver, doctor, accountant)

2) Jobs I may well be qualified for in ten years time (e.g. archive assistant, museum worker, historical researcher, librarian)


3) Jobs I could perhaps be qualified for now but will most likely bore the living crap out of me (admin assistant, receptionist, secretary)

Why did I go to uni again?  And why did I go back to uni again?  Oh yeah, because I'm INSANE.

Not that I regret going to uni, or going back.  Because I embrace my insanity with open arms, ladies and gentleman.  It would appear that I enjoy nothing so much as studying.  If only it were a job.  I have plenty of experience (having done little else for my entire life), I like doing it and I'm not too bad at it (although some recent MA marks have made me doubt this last part).  So, does anyone know of a way to get paid for going to uni for the rest of my life?  Anyone?  No?

If only writing was an actual proper job - you know, one with which I could produce an income in a reliable, consistent way.  Won't stop me doing it, mind.  Because this is me, embracing the insanity.  Come here insanity, I want to give you a hug.

1 comment:

  1. I'm with you there, Beth. Writing and studying - love it, just love it. Here is the way to get paid for going to uni for the rest of your life.Find a niche market - make yourself absolutely brilliant at something that nobody else knows anything about and then start sending begging letters to organisations that might furnish you with bursary dosh for a PhD. If only it were that simple... Good on you for one chapter. If you get up at 5 (no, honest - I've tried it!) work until ten you'll get four chapters done in day. OK, perhaps two in a day. First draft.