Friday 30 September 2011

Dissertation - stay gone!

I handed in my dissertation last Friday.

Wow, that's scary.  A whole week.

And what have I done since...?  Well nothing productive, it seems.

In my defence, it was my birthday on Tuesday, thus apparently giving me the excuse to be lazy for several days either side.  I attended a hen party and had a meal with friends last weekend... but other than that, I've not been up to much this past week.

I've been doing a little reading, finishing off a book I read for the dissertation and reading a few others I got for my birthday.  Nothing especially exciting in any of that.

I also wrote a plan for the rest of Hide and See.  I figured, up to the end of my dissertation, I'm a little under halfway through the novel.  I do (at the moment, anyway) want to finish it, and then edit it for several million years until it's decent enough to maybe publish one day.  I say 'at the moment' because I'm sure that as soon as I get my dissertation marks back I will once more hate it and never want to see it again.

Me?  A pessimist?  No.... I like to think of it as being a realist.

I can't help but feel frankly terrified by the prospect of getting back my marks for the dissertation.  Every single mark I've got back for the MA has been a disappointment.  I know I'm looking at it from a geek/over-achiever/perfectionist point-of-view but the fact remains that I've just not looked at a mark this year and been happy with it.  I really don't know where it all went so fantastically wrong and am thus dreading getting my results.

And so this is why I am resolving to get as much of Hide and See written as I can before the results are given.  After writing the plan for the second half of the novel I feel quite excited by the idea of writing it.  I had a vague idea before of where I wanted it to go but now that I've written out a more specific timeline I think it's got potential - at least in terms of plot.  I should imagine my darling characters will still be defying me at every turn.  *Sigh*

I'm starting to get that grumpiness from not having written in a while.  Methinks I'll have to get down some words this weekend - in between all the dreaded job hunting.  Ugh, I miss being a student already.

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